Brett Lee: I had to draw a line in the sand and part with Test cricket
He may have sat at the SCG to announce his retirement from Test match cricket yesterday, but Brett Lee knew that part of his career was over last August as England paraded around The Oval with the Ashes.
It was then, riddled with frustration, anger and disappointment after being snubbed for the final two games, Lee realised the longer game - and his will to be a part of it - was beyond him.
The 33-year-old paceman will now attempt to choreograph his exit from internationals altogether by fighting his way back into the Australian one-day team for next February's World Cup in India. ''If I can be there at the 2011 World Cup, if I could achieve that goal, I would be more than happy to walk away,'' he said.
Few, certainly Lee, could have guessed that his last appearance in the baggy green would have been the Boxing Day Test of 2008, during which he broke down with a foot injury. He managed to overcome that injury in time for the Ashes tour but after stunning form in the tour game he succumbed to a side strain that kept him out of the first three Tests.
Then there was the infamous blunder in Headingley when Shane Watson was told by selectors, coach Tim Nielsen and captain Ricky Ponting that Lee was not fit to play in the fourth Test. An incensed Lee fronted the media immediately after Watson's press conference to declare he was fit.
Lee was not picked, Australia won that Test in three days, and his chances of playing in the final Test fell as fast as his yorker.
He sat in the stands, watching Australia's defeat, and cursed the rotten luck with injury that had forced him to undergo 12 operations in his career.
''At the last minute I stumbled with a side injury, and that was really devastating and cruel,'' Lee said. ''To not play a part in that series was really hard on me. I probably knew after that fifth Test match that the time was right to leave. I had to draw a line in the sand and part with Test cricket.
''Before the Ashes, the way that I trained, the way I got physically prepared for that series, it's the best shape I've ever been in my life. I suppose it's why I'm excited about the future as well, because it was only last year. I know I can do it, I got back to bowling speeds I was really happy with, I was taking wickets, the ball was swinging, but also there's that fine line.
''Do I put everything on the line and play three months of Test cricket and never play cricket for Australia again … or do I give away Test cricket in order to play a few more years for Australia?''
Lee's priority now is three-year-old son Preston. ''I don't want to be away from home for 11 months of the year any more, I've done it for 14 years now,'' he said.
''I've got a young boy, Preston, and he's the most important thing to me in the whole wide world. And I don't want to be away from him for six months, I won't be, I promised myself, I promised him.''
Lee did contemplate quitting the sport entirely but said he still harbours ''burning ambition''.
After 310 wickets from 76 Tests, Lee sits fourth on the all-time list of Australian bowlers. He must now hope selectors do not consign him to the stands for the World Twenty20 in May or the World Cup next year.
''It might come up the way where the arm doesn't pull up the way I want it to I'll be happy to move on,'' Lee said. ''But I'm not going to give up yet. If I can bowl the way I did towards the end of last year it shouldn't be a problem, if it is the case I don't get back in, well, I don't get back in.''
